Completely alive

If

If you can keep your head when all about you 
Are losing theirs and blaming it on you; 
If you can trust yourself when all men doubt you, 
But make allowance for their doubting too; 
If you can wait and not be tired by waiting, 
Or, being lied about, don't deal in lies, 
Or, being hated, don't give way to hating, 
And yet don't look too good, nor talk too wise;

If you can dream - and not make dreams your master; 
If you can think - and not make thoughts your aim; 
If you can meet with triumph and disaster 
And treat those two imposters just the same; 
If you can bear to hear the truth you've spoken 
Twisted by knaves to make a trap for fools, 
Or watch the things you gave your life to broken, 
And stoop and build 'em up with wornout tools;

If you can make one heap of all your winnings 
And risk it on one turn of pitch-and-toss, 
And lose, and start again at your beginnings 
And never breath a word about your loss; 
If you can force your heart and nerve and sinew 
To serve your turn long after they are gone, 
And so hold on when there is nothing in you 
Except the Will which says to them: "Hold on";

If you can talk with crowds and keep your virtue, 
Or walk with kings - nor lose the common touch; 
If neither foes nor loving friends can hurt you; 
If all men count with you, but none too much; 
If you can fill the unforgiving minute 
With sixty seconds' worth of distance run - 
Yours is the Earth and everything that's in it, 
And - which is more - you'll be a Man my son! 

_____________________________

That's what I got for my fourteenth birthday as a present from my dad. Quite a checklist, isn't it? And yet, the all define but one concept: balance. We seek eternal pleasures yet focus on the present and never forget the past; we crave extravagant luxuries and yet find happiness often in the smallest details....balance. 

I wouldn't be so presumptuous as to say that I've even remotely achieved that balance, but at specific and sporadic moments, the see-saw that makes up my life passes its vertex, and a feeling of peace invades me. It all may tumble and go downhill in a second, but they can never have that moment. 

We too often complain about the overwhelming sensation that for every pleasant moment we experience, we face ten painful ones. This being the case, and I agree with the statement to some degree, we should cherish that ten percent :) I try really hard to believe that, and sometimes fail miserably but, if some of those moments are savored like they ought to, then at least I can say I'm truly alive. 

Something that I am trying out for the first time is scheduling happiness. In this case, I don't mean planning something for myself (not saying there's anything wrong in that, we should definitely indulge ourselves when we have the chance) but for others. I'm counting down the days to a moment when I know I will make others happy and, thus, find personal comfort. I guess it could all fall to pieces on me, but as another day goes by, it gets harder and harder for that to happen...slowly by steadily I'm getting there and the exes in the calendar seem to act as brick rows that make that probablity rise, until I get to the moment when it becomes a reality. Tic, toc, and another brick in the wall.